HOW WELL ARE YOU SLEEPING?

Sleep problems are in the news again lately.  This in itself is not news.  Estimates are that 27% of adults report trouble falling asleep or staying asleep.  We spent an estimated $41 billion on sleep aids and remedies in 2015 according to Consumer Reports.  While there is no definitive answer as to how much sleep any one person needs, sleep experts tell us we need enough sleep to stay awake and alert the next day without caffeine.  For most of us, we don't function well with less than seven hours.  With continued sleep shortages, you can harm your health through depression, heart disease, obesity, and Type 2 diabetes.  Of course, the most frequently prescribed aids are sleeping pills and I will not be discussing these.

Rather, there are several sleep issues of a non-pharmacological type discussed recently.  In an article in the Monitor on Psychology for February 2016 titled "Young and sleep deprived" by Karen Weintraub, she reported research indicating that adolescents need 8-10  hours per night but on average get less than seven hours a night.  Adolescents go to sleep later than older adults but have to get up early for school systems which not infrequently start at 7:30 or 8 AM. This interferes with their normal metabolism.   Moving start times for school has been shown to help with increased attendance rates, decreased disciplinary action, improvement in academic performance, decreased sleeping during class, and increased attention.  These are significant factors related to the well being of our youth.  There appears much research to support the recommendation to push back school start times by as much as 75 minutes.  The message appears clear that the later the start time, the more positive outcomes occur.  Note that all this occurs without any pharmacological sleep aids.

For adults who would like to sleep better and reduce reliance on pharmacological aids, there is Cognitive Behavior Therapy for Insomnia (CBT-I), a form of behavioral treatment that focuses on changing habits that disrupt sleep.  The treatment was mentioned briefly in a discussion of sleep issues in the February 2016 issue of Consumer Reports magazine, titled "Get more ZZZs, naturally".  There is a review of CBT-I in the journal Annals of Internal Medicine in 2015 indicating that the treatment helped people sleep on average 26 more minutes per night and reduce their need for medications.  It also was noted that the American Academy of Sleep Medicine recommended CBT-I over sleep medications as a treatment of first choice for chronic insomnia.  I have been using CBT-I principles for many years for referred patients with insomnia.  Of course, I always recommend that you consult first with your primary physician to rule out any physical causes of your insomnia.

So what is involved in CBT-I?   As mentioned, CBT-I  has a goal to improve sleep habits and behaviors. The cognitive part of CBT-I teaches you to identify and modify beliefs that affect your ability to sleep. For example, this may include learning how to control or eliminate negative thoughts and worries that keep you awake. The behavioral part of CBT-I helps you develop good sleep habits and avoid behaviors that keep you from sleeping well.

There are various techniques some or all of which you may need depending on your condition. These include: 

1.  Stimulus Control Therapy. This is a technique I have used frequently.  This method helps remove factors that condition the mind to resist sleep. For example, you might need to set a consistent bedtime and wake time and avoid naps, use the bed only for sleep and sex, and leave the bedroom if you can't go to sleep within 20 minutes, only returning when you're sleepy.  You need to be very motivated for this one but it will help you get better control of the sleep/wake cycle.  I remember one patient who got up 25 (!) times the first night after not falling asleep within 20 minutes.  That was the highest number I ever saw but improvement for the patient came rapidly over the next week.

2.  Sleep Restriction. Lying in bed when you're awake can become a habit that leads to poor sleep. This technique decreases the time you spend in bed, causing partial sleep deprivation, which makes you more tired the next night. Once your sleep has improved, your time in bed is gradually increased.  The trick here is not to take naps the next day as your progress then is completely undermined.

3.  Sleep Hygiene. This method of therapy involves changing basic lifestyle habits that influence sleep, such as smoking or drinking too much caffeine late in the day, drinking too much alcohol, or not getting regular exercise. It also includes tips that help you sleep better, such as ways to decrease your activities an hour or two before bedtime.

4. Sleep Environment.  These are ways you create an improved sleep environment, such as keeping your bedroom quiet, dark and cool, not having a TV in the bedroom, and hiding the clock from view.  You also may need to stow away your cell phone or laptop to minimize interruptions.  The light they emit also is known to interfere with sleep.

5. Relaxation Training. This method helps you calm your mind and body. Approaches include meditation, imagery, progressive muscle relaxation (PMR) and others.  I have written in other posts about such techniques as they reduce stress reactions and they can be very helpful here as well.  I have used PMR extensively in assisting with sleep improvement often in combination with the other techniques above.

6.  Biofeedback. This method allows you to notice physiological signs such as heart rate and muscle tension and shows you how to change them. Some sleep specialists may have you take a biofeedback device home to record your daily patterns.

7.  Paradoxical Intention. Paradoxical intention, courtesy of famous therapist Victor Frankl,  involves avoiding any effort to fall asleep. In fact, it really involves trying to stay awake.  Have you ever been somewhere, maybe even a meeting, where you are worrying that you need to stay awake but continue to fall asleep?  Paradoxically, worrying that you can't sleep can actually keep you awake. Letting go of this worry can help you relax and make it easier to fall asleep.

Whatever method or strategies you employ, good sleep is critical to your health, productivity, and well being.  Per the research with adolescents, adjust your sleep cycle depending on whether you are an early or late riser so as to get enough sleep.  Also, consider cognitive behavioral strategies as a first treatment for insomnia before resorting to medications.  You may be amazed at the power you have over this process.

As always, change your thoughts and change your results.  Sleep well my friends.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com.

ARE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS HELPING YOU REDUCE STRESS AND IMPROVE HEART HEALTH?

It is well known that stress negatively influences your heart health.  What we are learning is that there also is a connection between the happiness of our relationships and our cardiac health.  For example, married people tend to live longer and have better health than their single counterparts.  However, in a recent article titled "How marriage can influence your blood pressure" by Belinda Luscombe in Time Magazine for March 7, 2016,  emphasis is placed on the quality of the relationship, citing research from 2015 at the University of Michigan. Stressful marriages can negatively affect cardiac health.  For example, when the wife is stressed, the husband's systolic blood pressure went up.  If the marital relationship was going badly, both partners saw increases in blood pressure but more so for the husband.  When husbands were stressed, wives' blood pressure tended to drop, considered a function of the increased network of resources for wives to deal with the stresses.  It also was noted that when spouses fought more, they had thicker carotid arteries, a risk for poor cardiac health.  

There also are findings from research work at the University of Pennsylvania that married people survive heart attacks more often than singles and recovered better over two years than patients divorced, separated, or widowed.  Finally, researchers in Switzerland found that married people on average were 4.4 pounds heavier than single people, yet another risk factor for poor cardiac health.  The conclusion was that married people were less active and would benefit from doing physical activity together.    

While the work noted above dealt with marital relationships and is of course correlative, it is likely that ongoing stressful relationships in other venues contribute negatively to heart health as well.  These venues particularly would include work relationships where there is considerable research consistent with the conclusion that ongoing stressful work interactions contribute to decreased health in multiple areas including heart health.  Findings from the Health Advocate group show that nearly three-quarters of American workers surveyed in 2007 reported experiencing physical symptoms of stress due to work. According to statistics from the American Psychological Association (APA), a startling two-thirds of Americans say that work is a main source of stress in their lives – up nearly 15 percent from those who ranked work stress at the top just a year before. Roughly 30 percent of workers surveyed reported “extreme” stress levels.  Whatever the root causes, stressed workers tend to be fatigued, prone to mistakes and injuries, and are more likely to be absent. And most significantly, they incur healthcare costs twice as high than for other employees. The consequences of stress-related illnesses, including heart disease, cost businesses an estimated $200 to $300 billion a year in lost productivity.  

So what does all this mean for you?  How are your relationships both marital and others?  Do you feel stressed by them?  If so, you likely are.  While there is no one answer to solve these issues, there are several strategies worth considering:

1.  Communicate better.  I know that this is a big task.  However, consider sometimes just listening when the other party is stressed and don't offer solutions quickly.  This is particularly difficult for males who tend to be solution oriented, as discussed in Dr. John Gray's book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus".  If need be, consider going to relationship therapy.  If at work, you might want to get help for yourself rather than suffer the heart consequences of work stress.

2.  Find ways to relax physically.  This can entail relaxation strategies from mindfulness to yoga to progressive muscle relaxation, all useful in counteracting the physical effects of stress to include increased blood pressure.  Also, make time for physical exercise of some kind consistent with your health, such as walking.  

3.  Increase your social network.  As was noted above for wives who did not show a blood pressure increase even when their stressed husbands did, there is abundant research evidence that having an available social support network buffers our reaction to stressful situations. Women tend to establish wider social networks than men but we all can benefit from a wider set of social resources.  What does your social support network look like?  Is there at least one person with whom you can share your concerns? 

4.  Re-evaluate your mindset.  What conclusions are you making about particular relationships? If you say "there is no hope and this is the way it is", there will be no hope but not for the reason you say.  If you say "he/she is all wrong" it is not true, cuts off communication, and leads quicker to your frustration.  Always interrupt such overgeneralized and catastrophic thinking.

The more you can help foster your relationships, the less will be your stress and the better your heart health.  Good luck on your journey.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For more information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com

CAN YOU USE YOUR MINDSET TO HELP YOURSELF AGE WELL?

Wouldn't you like to age well?  Of course, we all would.  However, we all too often imprison ourselves in the outcomes of bad thinking and physical habits which interfere with aging well.  In a recent issue of Time magazine for February 22-29, 2016, in an article titled "It's the Little Things", author Alexandra Sifferlin noted three areas where changes can lead to improved aging and longevity.  These are the areas of diet, exercise, and mindset.  I will focus on mindset.

We know that our thoughts influence emotions which affect us physically.  There is much research about the effects of stress in causing release of stress hormones which trigger negative cardiovascular and other disease states.  However, in the Time article, Ms. Sifferlin reported research in the journal Psychology and Aging about the association of negative stereotypes about aging with brain changes associated with Alzheimer's disease.  In the study noted, twenty-five years after the initial assessment, those individuals with the negative stereotypes had greater loss in hippocampal volume, an area of the brain where neuronal loss is associated with Alzheimer's disease, than persons with more positive views of aging.  Also, on brain autopsy, the individuals with negative views of aging had greater buildup of amyloid plaques and neurofibrillary tangles, markers for Alzheimer's disease.  In other research in the journal European Heart Journal: Acute Cardiovascular Care, it was observed that individuals with negative views of aging had higher risk of heart problems 40 years later compared with people with more positive views of aging.  

So what can you do now no matter where you are in terms of age?  Other research has indicated  that mindfulness meditation (being aware of what you are thinking and feeling in the moment) can reduce stress and slow biological aging.  Three strategies will help:

1.  Be aware of your breathing and periodically take a breath, close your eyes, and focus on the present, such as what you hear and feel about you.  This will assist in reducing stress and the negative effects on aging even if you don't engage in a complete mindfulness meditation.

2.  View stressful events as transitory and interrupt any catastrophizing thoughts such as "I can't stand this (yes you can, you just don't have to like it)", or "I'm getting senile because I can't remember where I put my keys (no you're not, almost everybody has such moments)".  This will help you limit your reaction to stressful events, which is good for your emotional and physical health.

3.  Maintain or build your social connections.  There's good research evidence about the beneficial effects of doing this as we age and not just when we're young.

As the saying goes, aging is not optional but aging well is.  Catch yourself when verbalizing negative stereotypes and views of aging and interrupt them.  After all, as I always say, Change your thoughts and change your results, including brain aging.  Good luck on your journey.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com

IS IT TIME WE TEACH YOUTH HOW TO OVERCOME LIMITING THOUGHTS?

Recently I read an article in the LA Times Sports section for February 12, 2016 by Eric Sondheimer titled "As playoffs approach, bad behavior must stop".  The article dealt with high school level sports.  His central premise was that parents should start holding their sons and daughters accountable for bad behavior which includes everything from disrespecting coaches and taunting to physical altercations with other players and fans.  He noted the lessened respect for coaches who in the past just had to stare at players to lead to a halt in bad behavior (I remember how true this was when my 6'6" high school basketball coach Harry glared at me).  The author quoted Dr. Andrew Yellen, a sports psychologist and former high school football coach, who recommended parents demand accountability.  According to Dr. Yellen, parents often respond, "But they won't like me", to which Dr. Yellen said "It's insane,  what you do is, there's a reward, and if you don't there's a consequence".  The bottom line was that the author recommended coaches to bring back their drill sergeant voices and stares since  "not everybody has the self-control or self-confidence to walk away and use that memory as motivation at an appropriate time".  

Now I have no argument with what I read in the article as far as it goes.  Accountability and standard setting certainly are helpful.  But did the article go far enough?  I don't think so.  In that telling last sentence, the issues of self-control and self-confidence were invoked.  We hear daily of a litany of poorly controlled behaviors whether in sports or everyday life.  Professional athletes are criticized, sanctioned, and prosecuted for many behaviors including hurting others on and off the field.  Road rage is all but a new psychiatric diagnosis, bullying in schools and on the internet is rampant, and numerous reality shows highlight the overreaction of the participants when confronted with emotional stresses. Is it not likely that the common themes for these behavioral overreactions are the thoughts people have about themselves and others?

What actually is the foundation on which is built your own degree of self-control and self-confidence?  Based on modern cognitive therapy, I would contend it is the series of thoughts and beliefs we have over our lives about our experiences which coalesce into the core beliefs which guide our reactions to specific situations.  So, for example, when basketball Coach Harry told me I was not playing good defense and took me out of the game to sit on the bench, I had several ways to react based on my thoughts, i.e. what I say to myself.  One reaction was to tell myself that the coach's feedback may or may not be true, he is in charge, I often play better, and I'll get back in at some point.  The result: unlikely that I will become highly upset. However, in reaction two, I tell myself that the coach has insulted me, denigrated my self worth, and that I can't stand it (which is unlikely the coach was saying anyway).  Then, the probable result is high upset and distress.  If such beliefs as in reaction two have been reinforced and/or encouraged in me by parents or others, my distressed reaction and likely "bad behavior" is increased even more (P.S.  I chose reaction one and got back into the game a little later with more defensive success).

So what is the moral of this story?  It is that people's emotional reactions and behaviors can be predicted by listening to how they explain setbacks to themselves, whether they are young or old.  This finding has been observed in research studies on predicting salesperson behavior, which frequently involves setbacks and rejection.  But what about young people?

There always is more than one possible conclusion to make about something unpleasant which has happened.  However, all too often you may not examine the possibilities and tell yourself a thought far less catastrophic.  Instead, it is not uncommon for us to regularly conclude that because a setback has occurred must mean that you are not good, not capable, are being insulted, or can't stand it (which you can even if you don't like it).  Such thoughts lead to the conclusion that you must retaliate verbally or physically.  Maybe we should be teaching our youth how to overcome limiting/negative/catastrophic thoughts which lead to overreaction and produce problems for them in life in all areas such as work, sports, family, and interpersonal relationships.  Do we not owe this to them?  Don't we try to teach them everything else?  How about some ways of thinking to handle setbacks/disappointments/frustrations without rage, physical assaults, or verbal attacks?  As the author of the LA Times article indicated, "it might be better to hire a sports psychologist to figure out what's going on instead of hiring more school police?"  

I think it's time we teach our youth, if not ourselves as well, how to overcome limiting thoughts leading to overreactions.  As always, change your thoughts and change your results.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For more information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com

SHOULD YOU BE SCREENED FOR DEPRESSION?

Estimates are that approximately 8% of people over the age of 12 suffer from moderate to severe depression.  The signs of serious depression are many and include prolonged sadness or irritability, sleep and appetite disturbances, loss of energy, less interest in pleasurable activities, feelings of guilt and worthlessness, and occasionally thoughts of suicide.  Depression is correlated with problematic medical conditions such as post-stroke recovery and diabetes management, among others. Unfortunately, many people attempt to deal with their depression through problematic alcohol or drug use.  

Between 2 to 4% of workers in the US suffer from depression and up to 50% of workers with depression experience short term disability.  There are significant financial costs to employers. For example, in studies from the University of Michigan Depression Center, the total economic burden of depression in 2000 was $83 billion and the majority of this cost (62% or $52 billion) was due to lost workplace productivity.  It is not uncommon for depressed workers to have poorer on the job performance.  

So should we be doing more to screen for depression?  Apparently the medical establishment has decided yes.  The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force has recommended that general physicians/primary care physicians screen all adults for depression and treat those affected by it with antidepressant medication, refer them to psychotherapy, or both.  The Task Force also recommended that all pregnant and postpartum women be screened for signs of depression as well as older adults.  Pregnant women with depression are recommended a range of treatments including cognitive behavior therapy, an evidence based psychotherapy with demonstrated efficacy in treating depression.  This policy is a departure from previous recommendations which only had recommended that physicians look for signs of depression periodically when resources to treat were in place.  The new recommendations recently were published in the Journal of the American Medical Association.

So should you seek out screening for depression?  Occasional sadness or the "blues" are a part of life for most people.  However, if you or a loved one have been suffering from one or more of the symptoms noted earlier, it would be prudent to seek out screening. Your physician healthcare professional is in a position to use several available depression screening tools as well as assess whether any of your physical/medical conditions may be influencing your self-report.  Your professional can refer you to a mental health professional, who may be a psychiatrist, psychologist, social worker, or mental health trained registered nurse.  But do keep in mind that help is available and ranges from medication to cognitive behavior therapy. The treatment of depression has transitioned into the mainstream of American medical care. There is no excuse for failing to diagnose and treat depression.  

You can change your life but you must take action.  Change your thoughts and change your results.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com.

DO YOU SUFFER FROM INFOMANIA?

What is infomania?  It is defined by the Oxford dictionary as "the compulsive desire to check or accumulate news and information typically via mobile phone or computer".  In an article in the Los Angeles Times newspaper business section for January 19, 2016 titled "Hello, I'm a digital addict" by Manoush Zomorodi, the author points out our increasing Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) manifested by attempts to absorb and retain large amounts of digital media.  Individuals spend long hours reading and skimming through material at work and at home.  Do you spend a lot of time trying to "stay in the know"?

It may be that you are causing undue stress upon yourself.  No one realistically can keep up with all the material and information which comes at us each day.  To try to do this exceeds our brain's capacity to process such large amounts of information.  Our attempts to do so through multitasking are futile as increasingly there is consensus that multitasking is not effective and leads to decisional fatigue.  In the LA Times article, Professor Gloria Mark at the UC Irvine Department of Informatics is mentioned.  In her study, she found that the less sleep we get, the shorter our attention spans are on any computer screen the next day and the more likely that we are to turn to social media such as Facebook.  Thus, the problem is that we train our brains to handle less challenging mental activities.

So what can you do if you suffer from infomania?  Thankfully, there is hope for relief even without medicines.

First, you can take a breath, relax, and focus on the present.  This often is termed mindfulness and helps our brains refocus.  Whether you do meditation, yoga, progressive muscle relaxation, do something to help yourself refocus.  Second, you then can spend more time prioritizing what is important for you to take in mentally, reflect on the material consonant with your goals, and let go of much of the rest.  

Does it make sense to focus on what are your goals and what type of information helps you achieve them?  Without doing so and reflecting on relevant material you've prioritized, you will be at the mercy of "infomania".  And that's not good for you.  As always, change your thoughts and change your results.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com

HOW ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS?

Halfway  through the month of January, it's a good time to reflect on how you're doing with your New Year's resolutions.  We all know that people start out with good intentions but that after several weeks to a month, resolutions are forgotten or superceded by other priorities. Why does this happen and what can you do about it?  Basically, resolutions are nothing more than goals.  So the same principles and guidelines which apply to goal setting and accomplishment apply to what we call resolutions.  In case you missed it, there was an interesting article on this topic in the Los Angeles Times business section for January 10, 2016, titled "How to follow through on resolutions" by Jena McGregor, who consulted several experts on how you can increase your chances of following through on goals.  

One principal reason for why you fall away from your resolution or goal is that the present overwhelmns the future.  If you choose to get your files better organized at work, then that goal takes you into the future.  However, if your supervisor has other priorities for you, then that present directive may relegate your well intentioned goal/resolution to incompletion.  So what can you do?  From the article noted above, there are five recommendations:

1.  Make it public.  It long has been a tenet of social psychology that a public commitment to a goal has a better chance of accomplishment than a private commitment you keep to yourself.  So tell someone you trust and who hopefully will support you in your effort.

2.  Set milestone markers.  This is the idea of breaking down the goal/resolution into smaller but accomplishable pieces.  We've all heard the joke which goes like this: "How do you eat an elephant?  A bite at a time".  When you break down your goal into smaller pieces, it will be less overwhelmning.

3.  Use "if/then" statements to form new habits.  You can get more done by using this strategy.  Put your goals into these kinds of statements and you will be more likely to stay with it.  For example, using the file organization task, you might decide to break it down alphabetically, e.g. do files beginning with A or B at a particular time such as Tuesday at 3 PM.  Your statement might go like this: If it's Tuesday at 3 PM, then I work on organizing files labeled A and B.  When you accomplish that, rework it for C and D, etc.  

4.  Don't think too positively.  This might seem odd coming from a psychologist who talks about positive/growth mindsets.  However, Dr. Gabriele Oettingen noted that "too much optimism about a goal gets in the way of the energy needed to reach it, people feel accomplished, it's accompanied by a kind of relaxation".  Then you do less.  Rather, combine your positive energy with a recognition of the obstacles, referred to in the article as "mental contrasting".  If you combine this with #3, the "if/then" strategy, you will have a better chance of maintaining progress toward your goal/resolution.  

5.  Look for other fresh starts.  I use this strategy frequently for myself and clients.  If your goals are not working out at this point, pick another milestone.  There are many natural break points in life, e.g start of a new week or month, an anniversary of something important to you, a particular holiday, a Sunday reflection day.  Any can be effective to help motivate you to make progress.  So just because you got off the track by now, pick a new time to begin and use the other strategies and stick with your goal/resolution.  After all, you don't want to be the person whose goal is to cease smoking who says "quitting smoking is easy, I've done it a thousand times".  

Using all the strategies can help you achieve more than you thought.  If you slip, disrupt the tendency to berate yourself and overgeneralize, e.g. "I never follow through on things" which is simply not true.  See other posts for ideas on how to interfere with and challenge limiting thoughts.  You can make this the year you accomplish more than you thought.  Good luck in your journey.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related topics, please go to my website at www.successandmindset.com

CAN MEDITATION FOR 10 MINUTES PER DAY HELP YOU LOWER STRESS?

If you are Mr. Andy Puddicombe of Headspace the answer to the above question is a definite yes.  In an article in the Los Angeles Times business section for January 6, 2016 by David Pierson titled "Mindful of Technology", Mr. Puddicombe's company is profiled.  Headspace is a mobile app guiding listeners on meditation for topics as diverse as anxiety and relationship issues. Each meditation is no longer than 10 minutes though the developers are seeking to shorten that time as well.  Headspace  now is popular with celebrities some of whom also are investors in the growing company.  The company recently raised $30 million through the Chernin Group, a Los Angeles entertainment and media-focused investment firm.  Downloads of the app increased to 5 million in the last year and it is offered on Virgin Atlantic flights while employees at Google and Linkedin have access to a companywide subscription.  Various users of the app were quoted and noted that it helped them become more aware of stressful situations and then to focus.  Other users observed that the app helped them to become more mindful and present focused.  

I did like the reference to use of the app as akin to going to a mental gym.  As Mr. Puddicombe, a former Buddhist monk, observed, "We go to the gym to be more active in life in just the same way we meditate; so we can be more mindful and more present and enjoy our life a little bit more."  As we start the New Year with increased emphasis on physical health and the yearly rush to gym memberships, there is less emphasis on increasing our mental fitness.  Such mental fitness includes being able to relax mentally and physically, focus, have more mental energy, solve problems more efficiently, reduce stress, and enjoy life more.  

But can you really do this with 10 minutes or less per day?  What research is available regarding meditation has used longer time periods of practice.  There is some early evidence from research that meditators can reduce activation in stress circuits in the frontal lobe, reduce blood pressure, and lower blood serum cortisol, a stress hormone.  

Should you try such technology?  Whether or not you can lower stress with such apps, there is no denying their increasing popularity.  I also recognize that there is extremely low risk of any harm.  For those individuals who might benefit, there is no harm in giving it a try and its easy accessibility is attractive.  

However, as a clinical neuropsychologist who writes frequently on stress related topics, I would remind that there are millions of people who suffer from such severe stress reactions that their physical and mental health are compromised, resulting in lost workplace productivity and lessened well being in their lives.  Are you one of those people?  If so, the app probably would not be enough for you.  Rather, you are advised to a more comprehensive stress management package addressing the multiple factors I have discussed in other posts.  These include:

Changing Mindsets

Mindfulness approaches, i.e. meditation, progressive muscle relaxation, yoga, massage

Proper diet and exercise

Good time management

Positive self-affirmations

Creation of proper social supports

Goal setting, focus, and improved problem solving

Improved communication skills and relationship building

Spirituality

I have found the above factors to help reduce the deleterious mental and physical effects of stress with thousands of patients and consultees with whom I have worked over decades. It is more work than listening to 10 minutes of meditation.  Yet, if you need a more comprehensive change in your life to reduce stress, restructuring your mental and physical habits will help you reap lasting positive effects including reorganization of your neural functioning.  But if you feel stressed, be sure to do something.  Setting an intention itself will help empower you and give you a boost toward feeling a sense of self-mastery, another concept important to handling the stressors of your life.

As always, change your thoughts, change your results.  Good luck on your journey.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For additional information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com.

TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR STRESS BEFORE IT TAKES CONTROL OF YOU

I was reading the Los Angeles Times Sunday travel section for January 3, 2016. Almost the entire section was devoted to the topic of Wellness Travel.  Author Rosemary McClure wrote columns on "Get with a program" and "Kick-start the year in spa style".  In these columns, the author reviewed options for spa and fitness facilities in the Southern California region.  As she noted, "No one calls them fat farms anymore, but the goal is the same: to help participants regain control of their lives.  Most wellness resorts and spas encourage healthful living and try to educate vacationers about nutrition".  Programs reviewed included some combination of spa treatments, exercise of different types, nutritional education, cooking classes, massage treatments, and occasionally mental wellness programs.  In a small companion article titled "Relieve LAX stress with a rub", author Alene Dawson described the growing popularity and availability of chair massages at Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) and other airports across the nation.  

It is well known that the popularity of fitness clubs peaks in January following the holiday season.  Alas, participation drops over the year as does adherence to well-intentioned New Year's resolutions.  Also, many people experience stress during the holiday season with the numerous activities, demands, expectations, and gatherings.  How about you?  I also have seen many individuals with depressive reactions during and just after the holiday season.  

How well do you think you manage your reaction to daily stressors?  As I've said on numerous occasions, stressors are a part of life.  How you react to them is your choice.  A key element is your mental perspective, namely what you say to yourself about the stressful challenge. If you say that you're overwhelmned, can't handle the stressor, or lament that it is happening to you, then your response may be one of extreme distress.  On the other hand, if you limit your emotional reactions, note your past abilities to handle changes, and cease asking "why me?", then your response likely will be one of less distress.  Nevertheless, the New Year is a good time to assess your life in various areas.  

If you do not choose to pay the high fees of the programs listed in the LA Times articles, which range from $2000-$8800 for a one week stay, then focus on some or all of the following areas for managing stress, all of which I've written about in other posts:

1.  Mental wellness.  I discussed this above.  What belief and meaning you give to your stressors largely determines your emotional reaction, which then influences your behavior.  You can bring about positive physical changes in your brain.

2.  Meditation, progressive muscle relaxation, mindfulness, yoga.  All of these strategies serve to help you remain in the present, catastrophize less, attend to your breathing and helpful imagery, and have positive physical effects contrary to stress reactions.

3.  Massage therapy.  In a study from the Mayo Clinic, research scientists noted that massage can be a powerful tool to help you take charge of your health and well-being.

4.  Exercise, diet/nutrition, and proper rest.  All of these are necessary as a part of healthy living.  If you don't exercise, eat too much junk food, and don't get 6-8 hours of sleep, you are more vulnerable to overreactions to stressful changes.  

5.  Time management.  You don't need to get caught up in "To-do" lists.  However, being aware not to overschedule your days and saying no occasionally to requests will go a long way toward limiting your tendency to feelings of overwhelmn and stress.

6.  Social connections.  Every study I've seen indicates that social connections and support mitigate stress, lessen depression, and contribute to longevity.  You do not need to have scores of acquaintances but enough persons in your life with whom you can discuss your plans and concerns without being judged.  

7.  Spirituality.  Belief in a higher power can be a source of comfort and reduced stress.  There is research indicating that it is good for your brain as well.  

So there it is.  Having a plan with some strategies for controlling the stressors in your life will improve your physical, mental, spiritual, and social well being.  And if you happen to be in LAX feeling stressed, go ahead and try a chair massage.  Live your best life.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related issues, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com

SIX BENEFITS OF HAVING A PSYCHOLOGIST ON YOUR TEAM

In an article in the sports section of the Los Angeles Times newspaper on 12/27/15 titled "Changing their minds", Melissa Rohlin discussed how psychologists have become an important member of some National Basketball Association (NBA) teams by providing focus and relaxation. She noted how many NBA teams are "acknowledging the importance of the mental aspect of the game".  I got to wondering.  If this is true for NBA teams and players, might it not be as true for other sports organizations as well as business organizations?  After all, professional sports teams are business organizations.

So you ask, what exactly might psychologists bring to organizations?  There are at least six potential benefits:

1.  Better understanding of yourself.  How do you handle your emotions under pressure and in stressful situations?  A psychologist can help you or those in your organization to understand your motives, limiting beliefs, and self doubts.

2.  Learn how to relax and reduce stress.  All organizations have deadlines and other forms of pressure, whether it's the last two minutes of a close ball game or a project presentation potentially leading to a contract.  A psychologist can help increase mindfulness as well as teach progressive relaxation which assists you in becoming more aware of your body and situation. This reduces the usual escalating anxiety in pressured situations and fosters improvements discussed in the next benefit below.

3.  Learn how to focus better.  The more you are able to concentrate and focus on whatever you are trying to get done, whether improve foul shooting or attention to project proposal, the more you will eliminate or limit anxiety.  A psychologist can assist with this task.

4.  Keep emotions under control.  As the pressure mounts in games and business ventures, it is not uncommon for individuals to become emotionally invested in the outcome and get into conflict with others.  That conflict can escalate into counterproductive behavior taking energy away from the task.  In sports contests, that involves fights and penalties.  In business that involves preventable team conflicts about tasks and management direction.  A psychologist can help you learn to recognize the emotional escalation, interrupt the physical and mental manifestations, and learn other productive ways to deal with team mates and business opponents.

5.  Improve the team's functioning.  When someone is going through an emotionally difficult time on your team, it is almost inevitable that it will affect the team.  Others are not able to give their best performance because they're affected by the struggles of the other person. Those struggles can originate from inside or outside the organization.  Whatever the origin, a psychologist can help the affected individual and the team figure things out.

6.  Understand the perspective of others.  In working with organizations over many years, I've heard many laments about the boss, coach, or supervisor who doesn't understand the person. A psychologist can help you consider other alternatives and perspectives, learn how to communicate more clearly and effectively, and vent to a neutral person.

That brings us to an issue discussed in the LA Times article.  A psychologist is bound to confidentiality in treating the communications of those who confide in him/her.  While some might question whether a psychologist paid by the team or organization might not reveal confidences to the employer, there is no indication that this has happened by reputable professionals.  I remind you that psychologists are doctoral degree educated and licensed professionals who must answer to state regulatory boards.  Most psychologists have lengthier training and experience in behavioral science than any other professional discipline. This provides them with a foundation of education and experience to be able to serve organizations well.  

Increasingly, professional sports teams are recognizing that it is good business to retain the services of a psychologist who can bring the above benefits to their players and organizations. While the article was about professional basketball players, I have no doubt that such services would be of benefit to other major sports organizations, including the professional football league.   For those players, the pressures of both performance focused on only 16 games per season and the risk for serious physical and mental injury from repetitive brain trauma and concussions highlights the need for assistance with some of the above issues.  Business organizations also share many of the same pressures.  It is time to place focus on the mental energy and well being of employees across the business spectrum.  

As always, when you change your thoughts you change your results.  This translates into improved performance.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com

SIX STRATEGIES TO HELP YOUNG PEOPLE LEARN HOW TO MANAGE STRESS

In an article on 12/20/15 in the Los Angeles Times by Carla Rivera titled "Freshmen face exam jitters", she discussed the stress levels of college freshmen as they complete their first semester and ready themselves for final exams.  The author noted the physical manifestations of stress including sore throats, cough, flu, and upper respiratory problems.  Ms. Rivera further discussed the challenges college freshmen face with first year drop out rates noted as high as 20%.  She cited a survey of more than 153,000 freshman done through UCLA's Higher Education Research Institute.  Results included findings that anxiety and depression are challenges for freshmen with only about half of them reporting a high level of emotional health, the lowest rate ever.  What particularly caught my eye was a brief discussion of how some colleges are trying to help with stress reducing activities such as massage therapy and yoga.  

While almost everyone agrees that the college freshman year presents many challenges, I wonder if enough time and effort is spent to assist younger people to manage stressors in a capable manner.  Massage and yoga are helpful techniques.  However, there are many additional strategies and techniques available as part of a comprehensive package to equip young persons earlier to develop a sense of mastery as they face stressful circumstances.

There are six strategies/techniques which would help young people cope better and sooner so that so much psychological repair is not necessary in their adulthood:

1.  Cognitive restructuring.  This has to do with how we view the events in our life.  Listen to the people who lament, "I'm so stressed out", or "This person/event is stressing me out".  What that person is saying is that events control them and their view of their ability to cope successfully is low.  In fact, it is why some psychologists advocate training primary school children in modifications of cognitive therapy.  Why?  I have worked with so many patients who incorporated negative/limiting beliefs about themselves as children such as "I'm incapable/unlovable/unlikeable because . . . someone said so".  To be able to identify, challenge, dispute, and change these false beliefs earlier would have interdicted years of suffering and limitations in life happiness and well being and the need for psychotherapy.  The young person who can develop a cognitive sense of self-mastery still will worry about final exams but will neither make themselves physically sick nor create a state of anxiety or depression.  

2.  Relaxation strategies.  As noted in the newspaper article, some colleges are on the right path.  Of course, there are available multiple strategies to include meditation, mindfulness, yoga, progressive muscle relaxation, and massage.  Mindfulness and meditation approaches have been introduced in some graduate schools of business to assist future business leaders to manage their physical reactions.  Might this not be as helpful at even earlier ages?

3.  Time management.  A source of stress for many adults is the failure to plan, prioritize, and set limits as to their work and possible interruptions.  Do you take on too many obligations and fail to plan for interruptions, say yes to everything and everyone even when you don't want to?  Do you then feel pressured to get done that to which you overcommitted?  Good time management can help you as well as college freshmen who must juggle many school, social, and daily life activities in a newly independent life.  I contend that teaching them such skills even before college would help prevent the frequent feeling of overwhelmn.  

4.  Self-affirmations.  Acute stress can help rote memory, which is probably why so many "crammers" for exams actually do satisfactorily. However, if the task involves more complex problem solving increased stress interferes.

In the last several years there is new research indicating that self-affirmation can lessen the interfering effects of stress on problem solving.  I prefer the definition that an affirmation is a statement that describes your goal in its completed state.  For example, if the young person is trying to lose weight, their self affirmation might be that "I am feeling lean and powerful at my perfect body weight of 170 pounds".  Creating and using self-affirmations daily can increase problem solving and goal attainment.

5.  Exercise.  Many observers decry the lack of physical fitness in the young.   Yet, we all know that exercise and physical activity help improve general physical as well as mental health, leaving us with a sense of well being.  However, less well known is that physical activity may facilitate the brain reorganizing itself in response to stress.

In recent research published in the Journal of Neuroscience, a team based at Princeton University reported that physical activity reorganizes the brain so that its response to stress is reduced and anxiety is less likely to interfere with normal brain function.  Suffice it to say that the elimination of physical education in primary and high schools is not helping the ability of youth to gain the benefits of stress reduction.

6.  Social support.  Social support is the degree and quality of our connections with others.  In the mental health field, it has long been known that even the presence of one confidante buffers to some extent the onset/degree of depression, from which many youth suffer.   For the young people of today, they live in an era where frequently social interaction is defined in terms of connections on social media.  Yet, without connection to real humans, there is increased risk for adverse physical and mental health outcomes.  Social support moderates the effects of some of the other stress factors.

So let's go back to the struggling, stressed college freshman facing final exams.  I would suggest that a formalized stress management program early in the first year would cut into the 20% drop-out rate noted above.  Perhaps even more helpful could be to consider adapting stress management strategies and programs to both primary and high school levels.  In doing so, might we not cut into the hundreds of millions of dollars lost each year to stress related illness in adults in American business?  Might we not improve quality of life for so many young persons and help them develop the sense of self-mastery which will facilitate their enjoyment and success in life?   As the old saying goes, "An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure".  I think this is true in stress management as well. 

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For articles on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com

ARE LEADERS AS STRESSED AS WE THINK?

What kind of question have I posed above?  Aren't all executive leaders walking around filled with anxiety, working excessively, with their stress hormones raging, leaving them ravaged shells of their former selves?  Well, maybe not, which is a good thing if you aspire to leadership.

The results of research in the last few years suggest that people in leadership positions may in fact experience less stress than their subordinates.   In a study of leaders and non-leaders conducted by a research group from several universities (Sherman, Lee, Cuddy, Renshon, Oveis, Grosse, and Lerner, 2012; Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences), stress levels were measured by salivary cortisol, a stress hormone.  Participants answered questions about their anxiety in leadership situations.  Both on the measured cortisol levels and anxiety questionnaires, the leaders had significantly lower levels than non-leaders, indicating they were less stressed.  The authors noted that the leaders also exercised more, smoked less, woke up earlier, slept less and drank more coffee than the non-leaders.

How do we make sense of these findings?  As the authors suggested, and I too have observed in years of working with individuals in stressful circumstances, the more people have a sense of control over their situations, the less stressed they are.  

But what can you do to be less stressed as a leader or in your general life?  How do you counteract the potentially negative effects of stress?  Apart from the control issue, in some of my other writings, I've discussed roles for changing mindset and limiting beliefs, diet and exercise, social support, self-reflection, progressive muscle relaxation training, and spirituality, among others.  In interview studies with executive leaders done by James Bailey (Harvard Business Review, 2014), there emerge four categories of activities which serve to lower stress:

• Health - This category involves getting exercise as well as the proper rest, sleep, and diet. Are you getting enough of these activities?
• Diversions - Activities in this category remove you from your stressors.  These can include movies, concerts, TV, massage, time with family, etc.  Do you find time for these activities?
• Intellectual activities - puzzles, games, reading, study of a subject, sometimes referred to as a hobby.
• Introspection - This includes progressive muscle relaxation, meditation, prayer, breathing, self-reflection.  

While we spend much time focusing on the potential ravages of stress, less time is spent on developing and recommending strategies and activities to reduce it.  I have worked with far too many executive leaders whose view of stress management is to "tough it out".  Yet, as you can see from above, you can be a leader and suffer far less stress both psychologically and physically than you might have thought.  

If you are a leader already doing some of the above, consider encouraging implementation of stress reduction strategies by your subordinates.  The payoff is a better quality of life as well as a reduction in the productivity loss frequently estimated at hundreds of millions of dollars each year in American business.

What have you got to lose?  As I always say, stress in life is inevitable.  Your response to it is a choice which is under your control.  We are back to where we started.  More control leads to less stress.  Good luck on your journey.
 
Dr. Paul Longobardi

For more information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com

ARE GOOD LEADERS BORN OR MADE?

Just this week I was reading an article in the Los Angeles Times by Michael D'Antonio titled "Trump's royal inheritance" (12/3/15).  In that article, the author, who has written a biography of Mr. Trump, attempted to explain some of what he described as Mr. Trump's rejection of "basic standards of decorum".  Rather than explain it as a psychological malady, he discussed this throughout the article in terms of Mr. Trump's view of his own leadership traits as an innate ability.

Putting aside Mr. Trump's candidacy for President of the United States, I was intrigued by the question raised, namely the title of this article: Are good leaders born or made?  This is the most basic and frequently asked question about leadership.  The reality is that research on the topic leads to the answer both, but mostly made.  In research summarized recently in the journal Psychology Today, estimates were that leadership is approximately one-third born and two-thirds made.  This makes some sense when we observe that to lead effectively an organization or military unit is quite complex.  It is not reasonable to expect a person would be born with all the requisite skills to do this complex job.  

On the other hand, based on research, there do appear to be some inborn characteristics predisposing individuals to be leaders.  Research suggests that extroversion, assertiveness, analytic skills, and social intelligence are associated with obtaining leadership positions and leader effectiveness.  So can you become a leader if you are not born with the above skill-sets? Fortunately, the answer is yes as many skills of leadership can be learned through training and self development.  The range of leadership competencies also includes good written and oral skills, self-confidence, self-awareness, emotional stability, and openness to new experiences. All of these are trainable and subject to experience whether you are extroverted or introverted.  

 As Erika Andersen wrote in a Forbes article on leadership (Are Leaders Born or Made?, 2012), "becoming truly self-aware means to cultivate, on a daily basis, an accurate sense of how you show up in the world and what motivates you".   She noted that the majority of leaders with whom she'd worked were not self-aware and offered three recommendations:

• Reflect on your own actions as impartially as possible
• Invite feedback
• Listen well

In working with and coaching numerous leaders over the years, I have found as well that both self-awareness and openness to experience are critical factors related to how well prospective leaders will develop. Those more open to feedback and learning embody a growth mindset versus a fixed mindset, in which you either are born a leader or not (credit Dr. Carol Dweck for this distinction).  As has been shown, mindset is the ingredient driving success to include good leadership.  Most of the time in work with leaders, it is their mindset where I have to do the most work.  Almost all other factors can be developed and trained.  So the good news is that if you seek positions of leadership, you are advised to seek out training and self development. With reasonable self awareness, openness to new experiences, and a mindset working for you rather than against, your chances of success are good.  As always, change your thoughts and change your results.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com. 

BUILDING TEAM COHESION DURING THE HOLIDAYS

Well, it is the holiday time of the year again.  You're trying to run your business in the midst of holiday excitement, stress, and some distractibility on the part of employees.  Yet, team cohesion, or that sense of "we-ness" and being part of a supportive organization, should not be ignored at this time of year.  If you do so, you risk having employees less well connected to the company culture and mission. 

What can you do during this holiday season to increase employee motivation and cohesion? Here are three strategies:

1.  Show appreciation during the holidays.  As mentioned earlier, it's a stressful time of the year.  It’s important to remember to recognize and appreciate your employees.  You can express this in several ways from less to more expensive.  You can let them know your appreciation during an appropriate meeting.  You could send them thank you cards noting your appreciation.  Depending on the size of your group, you can take them out to lunch or dinner.  This was a personal favorite of mine when I was in management and took the team out and let them know how grateful I was for their work, loyalty, and commitment to the organization..  It always was highly appreciated.    

2.  Create a congenial and friendly environment.  Realizing that the holiday season is a busy and hectic one for employees, you can ensure that the workplace is a welcoming, relaxed, and enjoyable place for your employees to be.  Nobody needs to come to a chaotic and tense workplace at any time of the year.  During the holiday season it is even worse.  Work to create a cohesive venue showing appreciation as discussed in the first strategy.  Also remember to be aware of yourself.  You always set the tone for the mood of the company.  Take care to manage your own stress levels.  If you are frenetic that will affect others.  Model the positivity you want from others and you will get it.  

3.  Consider a holiday event in the workplace.  No matter what are the personal beliefs of your employees, you can create a company or team event to foster team cohesion and bring together your employees in a positive manner.  I have been in management settings where there have been large organizational events on site but also where departments or teams had smaller events on site.  Be sure not to place too much responsibility on employees for the event or it can become only one more stressing event during the holidays.  I always found it appreciated by all who attended.

Remember that the way you handle the holiday season serves to wrap up the current year and kick off the next year.  Consider what message you want to send during this time.  It is a golden opportunity to build a higher level of team cohesion while having some fun. 

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related topics, please go to my website at www.successandmindset.com.  

SELF AFFIRM AND PROBLEM SOLVE BETTER UNDER STRESS

How well do you solve problems under stress?  We all went through having to prepare for exams sometimes at the last minute.  Perhaps you've had to come up with a business proposal on short notice.  In general, it is well known that the effects of acute and chronic stress interfere with problem solving requiring flexibility and adaptation. Acute stress can help rote memory, which is probably why so many "crammers" for exams actually did satisfactorily. However, if the task involves more complex problem solving increased stress interferes.

Yet, in the last several years there is new research indicating that self-affirmation can lessen the interfering effects of stress on problem solving.  What exactly is an affirmation? According to researchers at Carnegie Mellon University, "self-affirmation is the process of identifying and focusing on your most important values".  In my own work, I prefer the definition that an affirmation is a statement that describes your goal in its completed state.  For example, if you are trying to lose weight, your self affirmation might be that "I am feeling lean and powerful at my perfect body weight of 170 pounds".

Using self-affirmation can improve your problem solving skills under pressure.  The research team at Carnegie-Mellon University found that a brief self affirmation activity helped buffer the negative effects of chronic stress on task performance when stress levels were rated by questionnaire, heart rate, and blood pressure.  

But you have to do it right.  When working with clients, I start with the following guidelines:

1.    Start with the words I am.
2.    Use the present tense.
3.    State it in the positive.  Affirm what you want, not what you don’t want.
4.    Keep it brief.
5.    Make it specific.
6.    Include an action word ending with –ing.
7.    Include at least one dynamic emotion or feeling word.
8.    Make affirmations for yourself, not others.

Then it is important to create the affirmation for yourself using the following guidelines:

1.    Visualize what you would like to create.  See things just as you would like them to be.
2.    Hear the sounds you would hear if you already had achieved your vision.
3.    Feel the feeling you want to feel when you created what you want.
4.    Describe what you are experiencing in a brief statement, including what you are feeling.  Start the sentence with the words “I am so happy and grateful that I now . . .   Make sure it is stated in the present.
5.    Edit it as needed.

Self affirmations work best for you when you combine the above guidelines with visualizations of how things will be when your goal is achieved, whether it is a personal or business goal.  

When you are under high stress, you will initiate better problem solving by taking a little time to create and/or reflect on a self affirmative statement that is important to you.  For example, if faced with a business deadline and you are inclined to feel high levels of stress, create a self affirmation such as "I am happy that I am working well at creating cohesion among my team to complete our sales project".  

This strategy is reasonably easy and you can use it before you enter a high pressure situation or start a self improvement project.  Give it a try.  If you start to do it regularly, you will be surprised at your successes.  

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For more information on these and related topics, please go to my website at www.successandmindset.com.

IS THERE ANYTHING YOU CAN LEARN ABOUT STRESS MANAGEMENT FROM OUR PRESIDENTS?

Lately it has seemed that we deal with endless stressful events.  The President is in the middle of much of it.  The President has to deal with political friction, economic worries, and global terrorism.  The two political parties have just managed the stresses of a contentious presidential election.  Various levels of government leadership must be vigilant about many issues including the possibility of an attack on our country.  No matter who you supported in the recent election, how do you keep your perspective in the midst of such challenges?  While there are multiple ways to manage stress including proper sleep, diet, maintenance of support systems, and taking time off, I have noticed four strategies which I believe have served our leaders well and may also serve you.  Consider the following:

1. Eliminate Negative Self-Talk.  When was the last time you heard any President or major leader putting themselves down or voicing negative thoughts about themselves?  It's not that they don't have them.  Instead, it is the ability to notice what you're thinking, write it down if needed, and thereby loosen the power you give to the negative thought.  Blair Singer, a coach/trainer I've studied, talks about "little voice management" and how your use of extremes such as "never", "worst", and "overwhelmned" are both not true and interfere with your best functioning.  The brain does not know what is true but rather responds to your degree of negativity.  Eliminate your negative self talk.
2. Restructure your perspective.  When you are feeling stressed, your tendency is to blame the circumstances for your upset and worry.  Would it not be easy for Presidents to blame external events and crises for why they feel stressed?  However, the key is how you respond to the challenges.  In a famous book titled Man's Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl described his imprisonment in a Nazi death camp.  He noted that although everything in his life could be controlled, no one but he could control how he reacted to his circumstances.  In taking control to restructure his perspective, he adapted to an exceptionally traumatic and stressful circumstance.  Have you ever heard a President say "Everything is going wrong", "I'm a complete failure", or "Nothing will work out"?  I doubt it.  Instead, to correct this tendency to which we are prone, identify and challenge the thoughts/statements/beliefs causing the distress.  After all, none of the above statements are true and your mindset influences your brain.  Presidents have advisors and cabinets to help them with this but you can do it yourself.
3. Practice breathing.  How do you feel when you hurry speaking without taking regular breaths?  Probably more tense.  The practice of being aware of your breathing is common to many relaxation strategies including meditation, yoga, and progressive muscle relaxation.  When you feel stressed, focus on your breathing for just a minute or two.  This keeps your mind from straying onto worrisome events and slows you down. Have you ever seen a President with pressured speech?  No, they take the time to pace themselves and this helps them maintain a calm attitude even in the face of crises.
4. Practice gratitude.  Take time to note, say, write down, or share several things each day for which you are grateful.  It works to help improve mood, lessen tension, and increase energy.  Research studies have shown that it helps reduce the stress hormone cortisol, which may be involved in the improvements noted.  

While few of us, including me, face the stresses of a death camp or pressures of life and death world events, our daily world confronts us with many challenges.  How you respond to these challenges influences your mood, energy, well being, and physical health.  The good news is that you have more control over your response than you might have thought.  While stress is inevitable, your response is a choice.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For more information on these and related topics, please go to my website at www.successandmindset.com.

ARE YOU A MICROMANAGER?

Have you ever had a micromanager for a boss or supervisor?  They spend most of the time checking on details, never want to be left out of the communication channel, and rarely are satisfied with your or others' work.  How did that feel?  I doubt it was empowering but more likely left you feeling low in morale and/or distrusted to do a good job.  I once worked in a healthcare organization where my boss insisted that every communication had to go to her as a draft and I was not to send emails to my team of supervisees without letting her see it first. Or by any chance, might you be a micromanager?  

If so, it's difficult to change but not impossible.  It's interfering with your own productivity as well as that of your teams.  You're spending too much time doing the work others could do and not enough time strategizing, which is one of the main tasks for managers anyway.  At the same time, your teams can not grow in terms of their abilities to do the work and learn from their mistakes.  Eventually, if not micromanaged, they will perform at a much higher level and be more accountable.

Now you ask why might you micromanage?  It's important to think about the thoughts/beliefs driving such behavior.  Very often, there is an element of self doubt covered by overcontrol. The micromanager might say "I need for everything to go right and if it doesn't that's awful". Thus, "I need to check".  Well, that's not likely true and is a gross overgeneralization to justify micromanagement.  Or, the rationale  could be a fear of seeming out of touch with what's going on in your organization.  There's nothing wrong with knowing what goes on but there are far less destructive means to find out, e.g. check with supervisors, find out in meetings, etc. If you are afraid your teams are not performing well, ask some other supervisors you trust to give you feedback.  It's a lot better than being overbearing to your teams and hanging over them.  

Good managers are doing several things.  One is to train and grow supervisees.  This involves delegation.  But first, you have to figure out what to delegate.  As I mentioned earlier, your job is to strategize, initiate implementation of strategic processes, and monitor.  Consider what's more important than other things.  I met once with a manager (not the one I mentioned earlier) who was not planning programs to improve the organization because he was spending so much time reviewing the documentation of subordinates.  When he was able to put someone else in place to do the documentation review, he could get back to the job of planning.

You need to talk to your teams and communicate to them the priorities you have established and/or which have been passed down from upper management.  Discuss how you want to get feedback about reports and how often. Invite suggestions about how you can help and support them in their work, which actually is one of the principal jobs of management.  I remember reading an article about the chairman of 7-11 Company who had appeared on the television show "Undercover Boss".  He described his job as being like that of the officer he'd been in the military.  He said that his role was to provide all the resources and support to the 7-11 workers just as he had to line troops in the military and then let them do their job.  

Know that you will have to rebuild some level of trust as your teams may still come to you for approval on many aspects of projects.  Resist the urge to tell them what to do but either convey your confidence in them and/or refer them to an intermediate supervisor if there is one.  Stay consistent on this one and you'll do fine.  Even if your employees make mistakes, take a breath and consider your reaction.  Is it really as terrible as you might think if the project or report is organized a little differently from what you wanted?

I've seen these approaches succeed in many companies with whom I've worked and consulted. Your role is not to tell people how to do their jobs unless they're in training.  It is to provide them with the resources, support, and strategic directions to do their job.  Then get out of the way as long as you've put in place some feedback mechanisms.  If you do, you will have a far more cohesive, productive, and low turnover company.  Of course, if you need help with your own thoughts/beliefs, help is available.  Change may be difficult but always is possible.  As usual, change your thoughts and change your results.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For more information on this and other topics, please visit my website at www.successandmindset.com

HOW MUCH STRESS CAN YOU MANAGE?

I was reading the Los Angeles Times newspaper yesterday and was intrigued by the page one story about USC athletic director Pat Haden.  As most sports fans know, his job is a very busy one overseeing a 21 sport program with an annual budget over $100 million dollars.  In the last several weeks, he fired his head football coach, met with school officials/team members/reporters to discuss the issue, and flew to South Bend, Indiana for the USC game with Notre Dame.  With his busy schedule, he briefly fell ill before the game.  This is a man with a pacemaker and a history of heart disease.  What was particularly noteworthy was to learn that the athletic director role is not his only one.  He holds more than a dozen outside posts on numerous nonprofit organizations,  corporate boards, and other organizations.  Focusing only on the health issue, his situation raised the title question: "How much stress can you manage?" You can answer that for yourself.  When he was asked how he can handle his schedule, in the very last line of the article, Mr. Haden was quoted as saying "I'm built to work".  Some might say that he has taken on far too much responsibility and stress and was long overdue for a stress health crisis.   While that may be so, it got me thinking about how we manage our own life demands, whether large or small.  How much is too much?

We all know that each of us is unique with a set of life experiences which may help or hinder us in managing life stresses.  But there are other factors which affect our vulnerability to stress.  These include our personality, hardiness, self-efficacy, and core beliefs about events (attributions).  

• Type A & Type B Personality.  Over 40 years ago, cardiologists Friedman and Rosenman described two personality types with differing proneness to risk for heart attack.  The person with a Type A personality is competitive, wants to be recognized, seeks development and advancement, looks to achieve goals and tends to rush in order to finish tasks.  Does this sound like anyone you know?  On the other hand, the person with Type B personality was opposite to that of the Type A person.  It's not that the Type B person has no motivation but rather is described as calm, relaxed and non-competitive.   In a longitudinal study with males, the cardiologists found that there was far greater incidence of heart attack in the Type A group. Individuals classified as Type B managed stress better than Type A persons.  Many stress management programs include components to help individuals become more calm and relaxed, such as the Type B group.  
• Hardiness.  It is well known that part of the negative stress response involves a feeling of loss of control over your world, whether personal or work. People described as "hardy" have been found to have three characteristics: 1)  Control - you see yourself in charge of your world and not the reverse; 2) Commitment - you confront problems and won't stop until you solve them; and 3) Challenge - you see change in your life not as a threat but rather as a challenge.   In studies of people divided into "hardy" and "non-hardy", results have shown that the hardy groups were less frequently ill and responded to stressors in a more positive way.  Do you employ the three C's in your world in coping with life's stressors?
• Self-Efficacy.  This term was used by Dr. Albert Bandura whose work I studied as a graduate student.  Self-efficacy refers to a person's tendency to perceive a sense of control in a stressful situation.  Instead of saying "I can't handle this", the self-efficacious person has a history of experiences leading them to feel able to confront stress situations more positively and say "I am able to handle stress and I can handle this one as well".  This all has to do with your internal beliefs.  If you have low self-efficacy, you are more likely to have more negative feelings under stress and manage events less well.  Would you describe your view of self in stress situations as one of self-efficacy?
• Core beliefs.  These are similar to the concept of self-efficacy but more broad in terms of your life.  Core beliefs are your more general beliefs about your likeability and capability in many areas of your life.  Your beliefs enable or limit you.  They create a negative reaction to stress or limit the negative reaction.  If your view of you is one of self-doubt and self-deprecation, you will have a more difficult time dealing with a challenge such as an illness, relationship problem, or work demand.  Are you able to question your negative or limiting beliefs?  If so, you will manage your stressors more positively.  

We all have a capacity to change.  Numerous studies have shown that even under the most stressful circumstances, the physiological manifestations of stress (hypercortisol levels, for example) can be changed by manipulating the psychological context of the stress and the attributes given it by you.  These include personality, hardiness, self-efficacy, and core beliefs. So how much stress is too much?  As you can see, it is not a simple answer and varies by individuals.  However, you can handle more than you might have thought using some of the ideas above.  How well is Mr. Haden doing?  How well are you doing?  Stress is a choice. You may not be able to avoid a stressful event but you can change your response to it in a more positive way.  

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on this and other topics, visit my website at www.successandmindset.com.

HOW YOU DOING?

Yes, I realize that the title is not the best English.  However, it does reflect how we inquired of one another as to how the day was going in Italian New York where I grew up.  Alas, as we all know, some days do not start out well as there are many frustrations which occur in life.  Need I name them?  Get up late, freeway traffic, conflict with a co-worker, to name just a few.  Get the picture?  

So how do you deal with these upsets?  You can let them take you to a level of distress where you declare, "This day is awful", or my favorite, "I'm so stressed".  When this happens, your day will spiral downward.  But it does not have to be this way.  You can make a conscious choice to be less upset and happier. A lot of this choice has to do with what thoughts you think when upsetting events occur.  I was watching a television program yesterday where the interviewer was speaking with an Army Captain in Afghanistan about how he managed to control his reaction to stressors, such as getting shelled with rockets.  The Captain pulled out a laminated card he kept in his pocket and read his Rule #1: My thoughts cause my feelings, control my thoughts and control my feelings. 

Yes, you can turn a potentially bad day into a good one.  Shawn Achor, author of "The Happiness Advantage", noted that “Studies show that when you’re positive, you’re 31% more productive, you’re 40% more likely to receive a promotion, you have 23% fewer health-related effects from stress, and your creativity rates triple.”  So what can you do?:

• Catch your bad mood quickly.  I tell this to my patients and clients all the time.  It is easier said than done.  Even harder is to identify the source of your distress rather than globally saying "I feel bad, awful, etc.".  The faster that you even notice that you have a bad mood, the quicker you can do something about it.  This happened to me yesterday.  I realized I was feeling frustrated and checked myself.  I noted that I was upset because "I'm behind on several projects".  What else might you say to yourself about this which would be even more upsetting?  How about, "I never get anything done, I'll never catch up, I'm not very capable"? As you can imagine, the latter statements are thoughts which will drive more upset and distressing emotions.  In other posts, I've discussed how to challenge these overgeneralized and untrue thoughts.  Recognizing the thought is half the battle.  
• Find something for which you can be thankful.  Did you know that neuroimaging studies show that it is very hard to be distraught and thankful at the same time?  So ask yourself what are one or two good things going on at this time?  In my case, it was that I was making some progress on opening over a week's worth of mail and was looking forward to seeing family members a little later.  This helps restore perspective on what otherwise looks like a bad day.
• Take an action.  This will help interfere with and disrupt the negative trend. As I noted, I was making progress on opening, sorting, and discarding over one week's mail.  I was able to record a victory, albeit a small one.  Speaker/trainer/author Blair Singer, in his book "Little Voice Mastery", says we do not celebrate the small victories in our daily lives often enough.  
• Do something different.  Change your routine even a little.  Take a walk, go somewhere else, listen to music.  Or, take some deep breaths.  Aas neuroscientists know, breathing helps activate areas of our prefrontal cortex involved in positive, pleasant emotions.  
• Re-evaluate your expectations.  If you set unattainable expectations, you're headed for a bad day.  If I expect that I will complete multiple chapters on several books, review all correspondence, open over one week's mail, handle multiple administrative tasks, all in the course of a half day before going to an event, than I'm doomed to failure.  It would be better for me or you to write down several short and attainable goals for the day.  If you meet or exceed them, good, you will feel better.  Again, be sure to celebrate your small or partial victories. 
• Learn from your day.  Use the three part formula for helping to reduce future bad days and learn from them.  First, note what went well.  Second, note what did not go so well. Third, make a plan to build on the positives and either avoid or know how to deal better with the stressors which triggered your negative thoughts and  feelings.  I use this formula all the time with myself and with my patients and clients.  It really helps.

While you can not control upsetting things happening in your personal and work life, you can control how you choose to respond to them.  Stress is a choice and so is happiness.  Change your thoughts and change your results.

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information and posts on these and related topics, go to my website at www.successandmindset.com

ARE YOUR TECHNOLOGY DEVICES STRESSING YOU AND YOUR BRAIN?

Are you getting your proper rest and sleep at night?  The chances are good that you are not, particularly if you are overly dependent on your technology devices such as your cell phone, computer, or tablet.  Do you worry and obsess when you are out of electronic contact for over an hour? Do you experience panic when your device is out of power and you can't find your charger?  Do you ruminate about how much you miss when you are asleep?  Do you sleep with your cell phone on and near, waking up to check it one or more times during the night?  If so, you may be less efficient and productive the next day following your nocturnal technology struggles.  Whether you are the leader or an employee in your work organization, both you and the company's productivity may suffer from your behaviors.  I recall a supervisor in an organization who was checking her cell phone so often during meetings which she chaired that when someone asked her a question, she was unable to answer as she had not been paying attention to the meeting she was leading.  Is this an extreme example? Maybe. 

There is an increase in recent research regarding the impact of technology upon you and your brain.  In various sleep studies related to the psychology of technology, Dr. Larry Rosen and colleagues at California State University, Dominguez Hills, have noted two important variables facilitating our use of technology leading to poor sleep.  Those two variables are poor executive functioning (ability to pay attention, organize our activities, solve problems, and make decisions) and anxiety at work and in your personal life contributing to fear of missing something important.  Dr. Rosen and colleagues consider that anxiety is the more critical factor leading to the frequent checking and use of phones during the day and waking up at night to check the phone, resulting in poorer sleep.  

So what happens to your brain when you are up checking your devices?  As I have noted in other posts, anxious people have more cortisol in the brain.  This makes us alert, ready to take action.  That is good when you need to be so.  It is not good when you're trying to get ready to sleep.  Yet, the blue light from your devices (phones, tablets, computers) increases the release of cortisol in the brain and prevents the production of melatonin, which is needed to fall asleep. The National Sleep Foundation has recommended that you turn off all devices an hour prior to bedtime.  Anxious people have more cortisol generally in their system, which further interferes with sleep. They have shorter attention spans and switch between one task and another more often than less anxious persons.  This multitasking has not been found to be effective and also results in increased levels of cortisol, the stress hormone.  And, as I asked earlier, do you sleep with your cell phone on and near your bed?  If so, that further disrupts your sleep.  With less efficient sleep, you lose the benefits of healthy sleep which includeneural rejuvenation and the elimination of various brain products not needed for good brain health.

Increased sleep deprivation in this country is leading to less efficient learning, higher emotionality, increased anxiety, and a less efficient brain.  Do you want such outcomes in your personal and work life?  I am sure you do not.  So what can you do?  All recommendations are focused on decreasing your cortisol levels during the day and as you prepare for sleep:

• Don't check your phone every time it goes off
• Space out your checking to increase your response time to one hour
• Turn off your devices one hour before going to sleep
• Do not keep your devices in the bedroom
• Do a routine activity in the hour before bedtime, e.g. watch a television program you enjoy
• Dim room lights in the hour before going to sleep to increase your melatonin which helps sleep

As I often say about stress, it is a choice.  Do not let it control you.  In the same manner, do not let your devices control your life.  

Dr. Paul Longobardi

For information on these and related topics, including my numerous posts on many aspects of stress, go to my website at www.successandmindset.com