We know that there are skill areas needed for success in life. These can include technical knowledge, getting along in organizations, good relationships and communication, among many others. However, sometimes less noticed is the need to bring your mind into shape as well. Doing so can take you to the next level in your life. We discuss these concepts in detail in our book (I Can’t Take It Anymore: How to Manage Stress So It Doesn’t Manage You; Paul G. Longobardi, Ph.D., and Janice B. Longobardi, R.N., B.S.N., P.H.N.), available on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/dp/1542458056. If you want more information about the book, authors, or on stress management, please visit our website at www.manageyourhealthandstress.com. However, for the present purposes, there are three critical mind mastery skill areas on which to focus:
1. Adaptability. This is your ability to manage change in your life and business. It is obvious that the more adaptable and flexible you are, the more likely you are to succeed. However, we often do not view ourselves as able to do so, often siding with the belief "we are how we are". This is a fixed (versus growth) mindset leading us to believe we can't change and that we know and are all that we can become. That dichotomy has been discussed by Dr. Carol Dwieck in books and articles. Fortunately, neuroscience has shown us that we are far more influenced by our environments than we might have thought. This includes the persons with whom you associate, activities on which you work, and your thoughts. Changing those thoughts physically changes your brain. Also, your mindset about change will affect and be influenced by those around you to include family, friends, and co-workers. Someone with a fixed mindset likely will not fit well with a group of changed oriented, growth mindset individuals.
2. Management of Limiting Thoughts. Controlling your inner thoughts of self-doubt is manageable but not simple. Self-doubt is one the major reasons limiting the life success of many people. Your overly critical inner voice really is trying to keep you safe, a very human motive. However, it keeps you back and never is really true. Is it really true that "I'm not good at sales", "I always mismanage my children", and "I never take advantage of opportunities"? No, but you can change negative inner voices when you first identify them, then challenge them, and finally replace them with more adaptive thoughts. Until then, you will hold yourself back. You can retrain your brain with more adaptive and successful inner voices. Some people do this with well targeted positive affirmations much like a pilot light ignites successful operation of an appliance.
3. Rebalance of focus. Decision making is critical to all our life successes. Life is full of decisions. The successful person balances their attentional focus between the logical, thinking side of their brain, and the more emotional, feeling side. When these two sides are in relative balance, you make better decisions for yourselves and your life. This is the left brain/right brain distinction but reality is more complex. Suffice it to say for now that the breadth and direction of your attentional style combined with relevant interpersonal characteristics influence the type of person you are. For now, take stock of yourself, get feedback from others about your degree of balance, and consider what adjustments to make to your benefit.
Good luck on your journey. Your mindset either helps you or takes you out of the game of life. Remember, change your thoughts, change your results.
Dr. Paul Longobardi
For additional information on these and related topics, please visit my website at www.successandmindset.com