It’s easy to think that teens have no stress. They don’t have bills to pay or have a full time job, among other things. However, teens worry about school and academics, relationships, their own identity, the future, and money. As I discussed in earlier posts, there is clear indication that teens are suffering higher levels of psychological distress than at earlier times. For example, in a study from the American Psychological Association it was noted that rates of depression, psychological distress, and suicidal thoughts have increased significantly in the last 10-12 years for young people under the age of 26. Also, symptoms associated with major depression rose 52% in adolescents ages 12-17 years. This distress may contribute to teens making poor choices such as substance abuse, overeating, and avoidance of others and schoolwork in an effort to manage stress.
In our book on stress management, we discussed various relaxation procedures or exercises individuals can use to calm themselves as an alternative to worry or other unhelpful choices. Our book (I Can’t Take It Anymore: How to Manage Stress so It Doesn’t Manage You; Paul G. Longobardi, Ph.D., and Janice B. Longobardi, R.N., B.S.N., P.H.N.), is available on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/dp/1542458056. For more information about the book, authors, and information on stress, please see our website at www.manageyourhealthandstress.com. Many of the relaxation exercises noted in that book can help teens expand their stress management skills and provide relief. Recently, Amy Morin, LCSW, in an article dated 12/8/18 at verywellmind.com, also discussed such strategies. So what can teens do to employ more healthful stress management?
Deep Breathing. I too often have seen anxious people taking short, shallow breaths while exhorting themselves to “Relax”. Alas, such attempts not only don’t relax you but may in fact increase your feelings of stress since breathing in that manner physiologically increases heart rate thus adding to stress. Yet, breathing can be very helpful. Use diaphragmatic breathing or what is referred to as belly breathing. Put one hand on your chest and one on your belly. Take in a long slow breath causing the belly to expand much as blowing air into a balloon causes it to expand. Than exhale slowly while gently pushing down on your belly and causing the air to expel. In time you can stop using the hands on the chest and belly. Just a few deep breaths can interrupt a cycle of anxious escalation. As for all the techniques mentioned, there are books, tutorials, and apps available.
Imagery. Encourage the teen to decide on a calm place unique to them. They can write down a description of that place, whatever it is. It could be out in nature, at the beach, or even someplace at home. After they have written down the place with detail, encourage them to close their eyes and imagine that scene. When I was a young teen, I used this technique regularly to help calm worries before sleep and in some stressful situations such as the dentist’s chair. I had two scenes. One involved a calming beach scene and another was a backyard scene replete with grass, a basketball hoop, and swaying trees. This actually works. Encourage your teen to give it a try.
Progressive Muscle Relaxation. This has been my favorite for decades. It combines breathing, imagery and select tension/relaxation of muscle groups. Stress causes teens to tighten muscle groups and they feel worse. Learning to let go of muscle tension can help reduce stress. Teens become more aware of muscle tension with some practice and learn to release the tension. Encourage your teen to start alternately tensing (briefly, not too tightly) and releasing tension in arms, forehead, face, neck, shoulders, back, legs, down to the feet. There are audio sequences available on the internet to help the teen relax.
Meditation. Essentially, this involves helping the teen slow down and focus on one thing. In today’s hectic world, that can be difficult. Learning how to focus through meditation involves several of the prior skills such as proper breathing and guided imagery. It has been found to assist with improved mental well being as well as improved physical health. Consult meditation apps for assistance in guiding the teen through the meditation process. Even without apps, consider just sitting quietly, closing eyes, and focusing on breathing. This can be done for only a few minutes and then gradually increasing the time. Don’t worry if you find your thoughts drifting, just return to focusing on breathing.
Yoga. Yoga has various mental and physical benefits to include improved flexibility and posture and strength as well as inner calm. Teens can learn yoga in various ways. These can include taking a class or looking at online videos in one’s own home.
Teens with self management skills in the area of relaxation are more equipped to handle the challenges of their lives. They will be able to handle setbacks more easily, recover from frustrations and obstacles more quickly, and interrupt the cycle of worry, anxiety, and depression. Parents can help their teens to do the practice necessary to learn a new skill, for that is what relaxation is. It is one of the best gifts you can bequeath a teen.
Good luck on your journey.
Dr. Paul Longobardi
For information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com