It is the holiday season, a time for happiness. But what is happiness and is there a science of happiness? Later this week, I will be holding a webinar on this topic on Friday, 12/13/19 at 5 PM PST. For information about the webinar and registration for it, please go to https://royaltygroup.synduit.com/TCWL0004. For now, let’s go over some information. While there are many different definitions of happiness, I will use the following: “Happiness is the appreciation of life, moments of pleasure, but overall it has to do with the positive experience of emotions”. What would make you happy? I, like many others, think winning the lottery would do it. However, research by Dan Gilbert found that after one year of living with change, lottery winners compared to quadriplegic patients leveled out at the same level of happiness. This may be related to how our frontal lobe (prefrontal cortex specifically) helps us generate two types of happiness. One is natural happiness when we get something we want. The other is synthetic happiness or what we make when we don’t get what we wanted. It is possible to create your own happiness despite the common belief that only positive things make us happy.
So, a happy life is not always about getting what you want. It is about learning to enjoy what you get. Natural happiness primarily relies on external factors whereas synthetic happiness primarily relies on internal factors. Synthetic happiness can be a more long term, stable form of happiness than natural happiness.
Chemicals in the brain play a role in happiness. These include Serotonin, Dopamine, and Oxytocin. We can increase these through such activities as focusing on positive memories, exercise, setting and completing goals, and receiving more physical contact.
However, there are other practices associated with happiness in scientific study. One of the clearest findings, per studies at Harvard under Robert Waldinger, is that good relationships keep us healthier and happier. They protect our bodies and brains as well. How can you develop deeper relationships in your life?
Yet another way to foster a happier disposition is to practice gratitude. People who regularly practice gratitude report experiencing more joy, pleasure, optimism, happiness, and higher levels of positive emotions. Consider using a gratitude journal, I use this often with my patients. Practice the motions of smiling and saying thank you. Use prayers of gratitude if it fits with your spiritual traditions.
Another path toward happiness is to practice mindfulness. This practice warrants its own book. It is defined as a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations. Research has shown that those who practice mindfulness regularly are happier because their thoughts are not consumed by fears of things to come, controlling future situations, or analyzing circumstances that have passed.
One of my favorite paths toward happiness is to connect with nature. Research is growing on the connection that nature makes us healthier and happier people. Nature teaches us that there is nothing wrong with us. In nature, time slows down and urgency and deadlines melt away while we surrender control and reinforce acceptance. When were you last in nature?
Research also has shown that possessing wealth and material goods does not lead to happiness, giving them away actually does. Studies of people who practice giving, donating, and volunteering show that they have better psychological, mental, and increased longevity.
So, if you would like to be more happy, consider some or all of the following:
Savor the moment
Take control of your time
Act happy
Exercise and make time for sleep
Give time and attention to close relationships
Be mindful
Spend more time in nature
Express gratitude
Give more
The key to happiness is knowing you have the power to choose what to accept and what to let go. As I always say, stress is a choice but so is happiness. May you choose happiness and not stress. For information about stress management, please see our book (I Can’t Take It Anymore: How to Manage Stress so It Doesn’t Manage You; Paul G. Longobardi, Ph.D., and Janice B. Longobardi, R.N., B.S.N., P.H.N.) available on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/dp/1542458056. For details about the book, authors, and other stress related information, please see our website at www.manageyourhealthandstress.com.
Good luck on your journey.
Dr. Paul Longobardi
For information on these and related topics, please visit my website at www.successandmindset.com